Francis lives in a hut made entirely of hemp, built on top of a humpback whale in a valiant effort to stop the harpoons. He drives a 1978 Huffy Green Machine, and is a member of the fringe Mother Earth-worshipping cult that tried to swindle Rerun in that episode of “What’s Happening!!” In the 90’s, he went on a six-year partial silence strike to stop world suffering, in which didn’t use any vowels. Boy, did he miss the shwa.

Francis compulsively makes movies. His first is Buttleman, a comedy about a tuxedo salesman who thinks he's the next Evel Knievel. His second is a thriller in post production. He writes for Gristmill, the daily blog for the influential environmental magazine Grist, and is a contributing editor to francisstokes.com, after which he was named.