It’s come to this. Reading the handwriting on the wall, an unlikely advocate has asked the Senate to introduce emission caps on greenhouse gases. The handwriting on the wall in question was written in polar bear blood with coal crayons in giant block letters seventy-five miles high saying, “WE’RE FUCKED.” In times like these, strange things can happen.
Exelon Corp. and Duke Energy Corp., the two largest U.S. utility owners, joined PNM Resources and Sempra Energy at a Senate hearing Tuesday to express support for creation of a federal program to set limits for U.S. greenhouse gas emissions.
This is good practice for comedy spit takes, if you’re reading this while drinking your morning coffee. I’ll set you up this time. So, I was just reading the newspaper today (lift up the cup) and I read something interesting in the business section… (Take an adequate swig.)
Exelon Corp. and Duke Energy Corp., the two largest U.S. utility owners, joined PNM Resources and Sempra Energy at a Senate hearing Tuesday to express support for creation of a federal program to set limits for U.S. greenhouse gas emissions.
PI-TOOEY! Audience laughter. Cue theme music. Perfect. That one might even end up in next season’s opening credits montage of the sitcom of your life.
The utilities requested emission caps so they have time to budget and properly prepare to meet those goals. As one industry exec pointed out, the first Senate hearing on global warming was in 1978. So, they’ve had a little time to think on it.
Most lawmakers predict Congress ultimately will pass a law with an emissions trading scheme called a "cap-and-trade" system. Companies that reduce emissions could sell credits to companies that have a harder time reducing pollution.
I tried to use this system with my junior prom date. I argued that after she put a cap on the advances of the creepy Christian rock guy, he traded his credits to me so I should get to third base. Didn’t work.
US Senate panel takes baby steps on climate change (Reuters)